On the human thesaurus.

[I hand Allie a new mechanical pencil.]

Oh! Look at you, my little purple pencil… You are so pristine, so immaculate, so unsullied!

On gardening.

What are you up to, kiddo?

I am currently tending to our grass.

On surprises.

Mum. When you have a moment, I would like to show you something highly irregular.

On truth.

Fools aren’t born… They’re made.

On bioengineering.

Mum. Hold everything. Did you know that we actually have nearly all the supplies we need to make a human ear?

All we need now is an incubator and a mouse!!!!!!

On information.

[Watching documentary on the origins of the universe]

I love it when they go over the data.

On essentials.

Hey kiddo, I see you’ve brought your calculator to breakfast. Are you planning to do some computation while you eat?

[Fixes me with a cold, fishy stare.]

Yyyyyyyyupppp.

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.